I recently came across an old Japanese tale about three men enjoying the beauty of a garden when a songbird appeared. However, the bird remained silent. Curious and eager to hear its song, the men pondered how to make it sing.
The first man proposed a harsh solution—if the bird wouldn’t sing, he would simply kill it.
The second man suggested a gentler approach, offering seeds to coax the bird into singing.
The third man, however, believed in patience, choosing to wait until the bird was ready to sing on its own.
This story reflects the distinct characteristics of the three men: aggression, persuasion, and patience.
Embracing patience is not an act of surrendering to inaction, but a deliberate choice to savour the journey, to experience growth, and to build meaningful relationships. It’s a reminder that life’s most valuable accomplishments require time, effort, and a willingness to endure uncertainty.
Four Ways I’ve Built — and Continue to Build — Patience
1) Being Honest About the Consequences
I can’t count the number of times I’ve said, “We need to get this out by Friday.”
Tick tock.
Tick tock.
But how often have I followed up with a clear reason why? Not as often as I should.
Deadlines are essential for keeping projects on track, but many of them are self-imposed and flexible. External factors can delay progress, and that’s just reality.
In hindsight, missing a deadline has rarely caused lasting damage. On the other hand, rushing and releasing an unfinished, buggy product has. If forced to choose, I’d rather delay and deliver something solid than rush and regret it.
This isn’t about slacking off or dismissing deadlines altogether. We work hard, push ourselves, and go the extra mile when necessary. But recognising when flexibility serves us better is a skill worth developing.
Takeaway: Deadlines are important, but so is quality. Before stressing over a delay, ask yourself: Will shipping too soon do more harm than good? If the answer is yes, patience is the better choice.
2) Learning From Other Areas of Life
I love baking and identify as an amateur baker. Baking is a beautiful lesson in patience. Unlike cooking, where flavors can be adjusted on the go, baking demands precision, timing, and trust in the process. You carefully measure ingredients, mix them with care, and place your creation into the oven—then comes the hardest part: waiting. You can’t rush the dough to rise, the cake to set, or the bread to develop its golden crust.
In those moments of waiting, I learn to slow down and embrace the process. The aroma gradually fills the kitchen, teasing my anticipation, reminding me that good things take time. And when I finally take that first bite of something warm, soft, and perfectly baked, the patience pays off.
Baking is more than just making food; it’s a quiet practice in mindfulness, trust, and the understanding that some things in life can’t be hurried.
Takeaway: Many hobbies require patience to master. If we apply that same mindset to work, we can approach challenges with a calmer, more measured perspective.
3) Avoiding Comparisons With Others
It’s tempting to look at competitors and think, “They just launched the new product— we need to catch up!”
That mindset, though, leads to rushed decisions and misplaced priorities.
There’s a quote I love (attributed to many people, so who knows who said it first): “Never compare your beginning to someone else’s middle.”
It’s natural to benchmark against those ahead of us, but it’s also a fast track to frustration. We see the polished results of others but not the countless hours they spent building, refining, and iterating. If we let impatience dictate our actions, we’ll never reach the same level of excellence.
Takeaway: Focus on your own progress. Comparing yourself to others can be motivating, but it can also erode patience and derail long-term success.
4) Tracking — and Celebrating — Small Wins
Big goals take time, and when we’re working toward them, it’s easy to think in binary terms: Did we succeed or fail?
That mindset is dangerous. If we don’t meet our final deadline, it can feel like the whole project was a failure — even if we made significant progress along the way.
I’ve found that breaking projects into micro-goals helps tremendously. Recognising those smaller victories kept morale high and made the wait for completion more bearable.
Takeaway: Don’t view deadlines as pass/fail. Acknowledge the small wins along the way. It builds patience and keeps motivation alive.
Connect with your WHY and HOW.
If you want to deal with a situation more patiently, connect with your WHY. Since a WHY is always positive and actionable, it positively affects my emotions and mind. I have become happier and know what to do, which has helped me be more patient. Your WHY is your contribution and its effect on the world. It also helps me know HOW to handle a situation. Your HOWs are your talents, qualities, and the things you’re good at.
One of my HOWs is being enthusiastic. When I connect with my WHY, I can use my enthusiasm to deal with an issue. It also helps me make choices faster. If they align with my WHY, then I go ahead. If they do not, I don’t, which gives me time to work on other things.